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April 23, 2009

This Cycling Question, and Debate, is a Gas!

Okay, folks, the question of the day is as follows:

Will the smell travel if you fart while cycling?

When you are bicycling and have to let one loose, will it travel behin you for a period of time, or will it stay in one spot?

If you are in a group ride, and someone is drafting you, will they receive the smell for a long period of time, or just pass through it?

I awoke this morning in a humorous frame of mind, and did a google search for Farting and Bicycling, and came up a Yahoo Answers! page where a variation of the above was asked 6 months ago, and got 7 answers.

One person asked a very valid question: WTF IS THIS? ASK A REAL CYCLE QUESTION!

So, is this a valid cycling question?

Here is the best answer posted, as chosen by the asker of the question, and 1 other good one:

1. There are many factors to consider here, such as the ambient temperature, the wind speed and direction, the absorbency of the clothes you are wearing (especially around the stench trench) your diet and your genetic ability to brew a bad one. I for one cannot factor in all these variables, but as a rule of bum, I have found that farts tend to linger for a while, during which time riding buddies tend to fall back a bit- in a race, a fart can be a highly advantageous tactical manoeuvre. Good luck to you, and pray you never get in a race with me.

2. This my friend is a very complex question, very many factors can effect the aromatic distribution of the gaseous release. For example if you are in a draft line the smell will definitely be detected should it be a real stinker by most if not all of your team. If by chance there is a side wind maybe only by the rider directly behind. The fart will linger as the tight shorts tend to hold the discharge for a few seconds after release, bibs can be even worse. With bibs the smell will actually be drawn forward allowing you to catch a whiff as well up thru your jersey! But fear not the smell will be just a quick blast, and as long as you are not in the front and called out by the rider behind you you should safely be able to rip one and get away with it.

BUT if you are a good friend or teammate you will peel off the line and assume a position at the rear, clear your rear and make your way back to the front.

Fascinating...um, hee, hee! ;-D

In the last 20 years I've only rode in a group maybe 5 times, so I'm the last person to ask for expert opinion. ;-D

Is there anyone out there who has NOT wondered about this important question?

Is there any one who has done some serious research on the subject, maybe for a study, or research paper, or something? ;-D

Any thoughts, and observations, from the Readership Assembled, especially those with experience from either the giving, or receiving, end of, well, um, hee, hee!

You can read the other answers, here.

 

 

April 23, 2009 in Bicycling Humor | Permalink

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Comments

While being a bit flatulent on a ride, be it solo or in a group, I have never been concerned with whether or not the aromatic discharge will linger or waft behind. What does cross my mind however when this occurs is that it's a shame that the emition of bodily gasses while riding doesn't act as a short rocket boost. Especially when doing a climb, when one is under a bit more exertion and is most likely to let loose. It would make for a bad group ride, but if cyclists could somehow harness that extra "power from within", think of the possibilities doing that final sprint or that climb that you haven't yet been able to tackle!

Posted by: Ohiorider | May 7, 2009 1:04:15 PM

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